i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I can't put those talents on a resume
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so