PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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