Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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