we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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