super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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