haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
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