i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
