I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
