you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
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For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
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the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
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