You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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