You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
