I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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