gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Houston, we have a blender
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
