That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
