he puts the penis in happiness.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
