forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.