Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
