Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
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My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
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Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize