seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
