billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
