so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize
