so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize