There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
