bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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