i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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