it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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