yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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