i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
false alarm. still invincible.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
