Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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