He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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