Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
