I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm going to jail i love you
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize