is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Randomize
