You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
