Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
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