that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
