Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
