Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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