i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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