i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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