oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
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