at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
my nose is crying tears of wow.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
