Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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