You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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