i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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