considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
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... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
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I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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