she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I forget how to act sober
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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