I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
