after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize