Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize
