There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
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