HIV tests are more positive than that guy
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
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