I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I know her cup size but not her name....
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
