I'm gonna have a badass scar
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Blow job season was short but glorious.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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